Happy new year!

I hope everyone had a good holiday and is ready to start 2014! Unfortunately, the Northeast US is about to get hit with a big, cold, wet blanket (of snow), so I thought I'd throw it back a bit (I really did just realize this qualifies as a #tbt, or Throwback Thursday for those who don't understand hashspeak) to a food review of a trip I took to Miami a few years ago, in the hopes it'll warm you all up. Consider it my gift to you for the new year.

I have only been to Miami once (actually twice, but the first time was on a cruise ship which doesn’t really count), so I am completely unfamiliar with the food scene of the city. However, if Tarpon Bend is any indication, the place is doing just fine. You would imagine that being situated so close to the water would afford it some fantastic weather and seafood, and you would be absolutely correct.

Visiting in March is a fantastic way to remove one’s self from the frigid cold of the Northeast, as Miami was a balmy 80°F with nary a cloud in the sky. I was in town for the day and a local friend took me down to Coral Gables to show me around. We found Tarpon Bend with all of its doors and windows wide open to let the great weather and good vibes into the restaurant. Tarpon Bend is situated on Miracle Mile, which has more in common with the fancier shopping districts outside of Los Angeles than it does anywhere in the New York-metro area. Being surrounded by palm trees and warm (not to mention clean) air help lend to the feeling that this would be a nice place to retire to.

It was a quiet Saturday afternoon, so the place was pretty low-key, though I have read in updates since my visit that it can get pretty hopping with live music and great happy hours. Naturally, in such a pleasant setting, I had to go with something fresh, so I opted for a mojito and we split the smoked fish dip, which they described as “in-house smoked Atlantic King Mackerel with sesame flatbread” (it’s really more like sesame crackers). The mojito was clean and strong, but not overpoweringly so.

The smoked fish dip was certainly more than met the eye. The mackerel was fresh (well, as fresh as smoked fish can get), well-seasoned, and just downright tasty. It’s served in this neat little rubber-sealed glass jar with the sesame crackers and some carrot and celery sticks. I was initially a bit nervous because it was topped with some strong-looking red onion, but one bite allayed my fears. The texture of the dip was balanced out by the crunchiness of the crackers with a little zing provided by the lemon. Paired with my mojito, and I was one happy camper. It is a little embarrassing to say, but I think I found myself scraping the bottom of that little jar for the last bits of the dip as we finished up. 

I think the overarching theme of Tarpon Bend is the balance it brings to everything. From the deep wood paneling of the fixtures and the clean display of its bar, to the flavors of the food, it seems pretty clear to me that everyone associated is well-versed in moderation and it shows. The only thing not in moderation was how much I enjoyed the food and the setting, but I can hardly argue against that. 

Big Daddy

The Big Apple is no stranger to any person or cuisine. From the exorbitantly decadent right down to your local $1 slice, this city has it all, including your fix for everything from the 1950’s (their website says it’s 80’s-styled, but the place looks more like Grease than greasy spoon). Their thing is to serve up burgers, shakes, and tater tots, and to be very good at it. Every once in awhile, we all have a hankering for a high-fat, high-calorie taste of classic Americana, and this is definitely a good place to do it.

Situated on Park Ave South just a few blocks north of Union Square sits their storefront (one of three in the city) with a big, bold Vegas-style sign reading “DINER” underscored with a pair of neon red lights. For just a moment, you can imagine a bunch of teenagers with too much product in their hair, rolling up in land yachts and waiting for the waitress on roller skates to come out and take their order. The styling reminded me of the décor of a Stewart’s Root Beer shop mixed with Jack Rabbit Slim’s from Pulp Fiction, save the place is much smaller and there are no Cadillac booths with fins. In any case, you can’t miss the front signage, as it is pretty much the brightest thing on the block. The menu is fairly extensive, covering everything from breakfast to dinner, everything in between and then back again.

I opted for the Grand Daddy, which was a bacon cheeseburger with tater tots stacked inside… and more tater tots on the outside. Paired with a key lime pie shake, I had enough food to feed a small town. No joke, the burger was the size of a softball, the melted cheese all gooey and the crispy bacon standing tall. The tater tots were fried to perfection, and the milkshake brought both the boys AND girls to the yard. Unfortunately, I had decided to indulge in too many of the communal fries we had ordered, and I did my ancestors dishonor by leaving the majority of the tater tots on the plate. In a way, this food is like the legend of the sirens in Greek mythology: it lures you with promise and enchantment, but leads you to gastronomic disaster should you fully indulge your delusions of grandeur.

In all seriousness, it was classic American food executed to perfection. It is designed to let you forget about the outside world for an hour or two so you can just enjoy in the excess. Your long-term cardiovascular health will probably be shortened by a year, but that’s the furthest thing from your mind when you’re washing everything down with that thick milkshake.